I don't know why, but I have this urge to run away from everything and everyone I know and go hide in a forest somewhere. Maybe its because it is the wee hours of the morning or because I can't sleep from all the coffee or because I feel uneasy about something, but I sure do feel like hiding from the world right now.
As I sit here, staring at nothing in particular, when I should be content and happy, I feel to urge to get away from it all. Not sure why. Maybe its because I haven't been on vacation for a while. Maybe its because I don't know what I want to do in life. Maybe its because I am not happy about the way things are. Maybe its because I just want to get away from it all and sit in a place where I have no choice but to contemplate what to do next in life. Away from computers and cars and phones. Just me and nature.
We do live in a strange world I find. We chase after silly dreams; buy a house; establish and raise a family; do well at work and so on. But what if all that overwhelms you? It seems like life is a race. All of it. From the time you get to work to the time you get out of there, to the time you loathe on the bus thinking about all that you still need to do at work or home. Never mind that it is sunny outside or that the ocean looks spectacular, all that comes to the mind is the lack of a sense of fulfilment. Like something is missing. Or lost.
But what? I have my health. I have a job. It pays the bills. It teaches me stuff. I have friends. I have the means to get around. Should I not be happy? And yet, somehow, I feel like the sun isn't shining when I need it to. How do I fix this? I don't know.
Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving to the good Canadian folks out there. Time for turkey, happiness and peace on earth. Or something like that.
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