Random Thoughts

Something happened to me. I was having fun. I should have known it would not last. It didn't. I met my Ava Fontaine. I have known her a while. She was perfect. PERFECT. I thought I was getting into something I knew. I enjoyed every minute of it. She seemed to enjoy it too. We had fun. I loved her laugh. It made those few seconds feel like an eternity of bliss. She laughed a lot. I thought I was able to make her do that. I probably did. The flowers looked prettier every time I thought of her. The world did too. Birds sang when I wanted them to. Noise dissapeared. Crowds parted. The sun shone on me. Until reality kicked in and I realised I was lying to myself. The world was just as cruel as it was before. She is no panacea for the pains of god's green earth. She is but a temporary blip, just as we all are. I thought it was special. It is no more special than anything else out there. She will always be Ava Fontaine to me. Perfect in every way. Except, that she's not real. I ...

Its warm. Very warm. Very nice. I went to the beach. I saw some whales. I saw some other stuff too. If this stay son, it will be a good thing for a while. I miss the rain already though. I must be crazy. Oh well.

I recently went on vacation. I was stupid enough to play around with my camera and format the card I had. I intended to press Cancel but somehow I ended up pressing OK and it started to wipe everything out. Needless to say, I was very pissed off. This card have over a week's worth of pictures and at 1GB was a lot of random pictures that should have been preserved. One of my travel companions at the time worked in an electronics store and mentioned that he had software that could recover the pictures. I was not too impressed because I didn't think the software would do _that_ much. At any rate, I locked the card and stopped using it. I kept it with me (and as a result had to dump pictures onto CDs more often) and brought it back. I finally got a hold of the software he mentioned and I tried it out. No luck. My camera, when connected, does not display as a removable drive on my machine. For some god-forsaken reason, my 7-in-1 card reader does not work. So, I give up on recoverin...

The Cinnyris genus has interested me of late after seeing a picture of a regal s unbird from the DRC. I have lived in Africa, Asia and North America. I know what poverty looks like. I know that a lot of governments would rather spend time taking care of their human resources rather than the other natural resources. It makes sense to try and feed your populace rather than say protect a species of plant or animal. Taking that into consideration, think for a minute about the Regal Sunbird. Do we really want to destroy this creature? I cannot make a convincing case for saving it especially when there isn't a government in place and civil war is the name of the game. But really, aren't some things worth saving? There is unrest in the forests of the DRC. People train in there. People cut down trees. People shoot at others. Others clear trees to cook food. This beautiful passerine's family falls into the endangered species list. Maybe we as humans cannot stop our own progress. We...

I've been on a binge of late. I have been shopping for all sorts of stuff. I started with an apartment. Couldn't afford it. Moved on to smaller things. I bought a pair of black Diesel Remy shoes. Probably the softest shoes I have ever had. They are SUPER comfortable too. I got a pair of Merrell Mesa Vent II shoes for doing the grind. Very comfortable. Of course... my time didn't improve by that much. I got a Puma Beluga Football jacket. Its colour is officially Pompeian Red-Moon Rock Gray. Looks cool. I got a pair of quicksilver Slang shorts. They are awesome! I also ended up getting Jeans at Mark James (they have a summer sale on now). I got a pair of Diesel Clerby jeans (these are extremely soft) and a pair of 7 for all mankind relaxed jeans. They're both getting altered (hopefully, with the original hem in-tact). How much has all this cost? I would estimate it at over $500. Ouch. And hooray for our dollar being so much closer to being on par to the US one.

Seeing as I haven't really driven very far with the car (except for Whistler), I decided to go to a different place with the car. The boys and I drove to Seattle bright and (somewhat) early (as in 8am). We had to wait for a bit at the Peace Arch border crossing and after a few questions from the border person, we were in the United States! If anyone is wondering, questions were along the lines of a) where are you going b) what are you going to be doing c) are you bringing any food d) how do you know each other (I guess two white and one non-white person does bring up that question) e) do you all work, and where do you work This being the first time I got to drive on the I-5 with the new vehicle, I had my fun with cruise control etc. They make good roads in the US. They also make large flags. We saw many a giant US flag by the highway, mostly in car dealerships. We got out on Exit 202 to the Seattle Premium Outlets because we had heard many things about the bargains there and becaus...

It has been 90 days since the merger. I have been with the company for almost 2 years. I applied for a new position last week. I have a good feeling that I will be offered the position soon (okay, I have some inside information from the fellow who wants to hire me...). I think it is time to move onto bigger and better. I am waiting to see how many people will quit now that 90 days are over. Who knows. That should open up opportunities for those of us who still want to stick around and see what happens.

Following up from the welcome back, screw you post, I applied for another position within the company. As part of the rules, you have to make your current manager aware. I did so. I got an email back that asked why I wanted to leave etc, and that my manager will vouch for me. That was Friday. I am thinking... well, that's not too bad, he said he will vouch for me. Come Tuesday morning (after the long weekend on which I worked), I am taken to Starbucks for a "talk". It was more of a monologue than a real talk. I was told a whole load of things that were untrue/scary. He started off by saying that I shouldn't think I was holding a gun to their heads by threatening to leave. I am thinking, I only applied for a job within the fucking company for god sakes. I was told they could replace me with the next University graduate they get their hands on. I am thinking, good luck with that. It gets better. I get a lecture on how I am taking the new team down. I am not sure how....

I have been the recepient of the 'Welcome back, screw you' special from my employer. I am sitting at Singapore airport spending the last few hours of my vacation there and I do the stupid thing and check my office email. Why? Because I was bored and like to know what is going on at work. Amongst the myriad of email, I see the Victoria Day schedule. I see that I am working. Then I see the schedule for the Sunday before Victoria Day (Victoria Day being on the Monday). I see that I am working that day as well. And I am given the choice of whether I want a day off the week after. Are you kidding me? So... not only do I get an extra-short long weekend, I also get to work at odd hours. Just what I need after my vacation. You would think these people would have some consideration for my sanity but then again why should they? Things like this not only piss me off, they also add to the list of grievances I have against these lovely folks. So the next time you are in Singapore airport ...

We were in Goa for 3 nights and 4 days. The hotel was right on the beach. The weather was absolutely wonderful. You cannot truly soak in the life style and adjust to life the Goan way in 3 or 4 days. You need to stay for a bit longer (like a couple of months!) to really get into the way of the land. That's probably why a lot of people I saw in Goa were from elsewhere and were dreading their flights home. The last of the charter flights back from Goa to England, Russia and Sweden were ending at the end of April. The nice thing about the beaches of Goa (unlike so many other beaches in India) is that it is clean. There are plenty of scantily clad foreigners and a little army of locals who are trying to sell everything useless under the sun to these tourists at exhorbitant prices. And for the most part these tourists convert everything to their respective currency and say oh wow, what a bargain! Now I do agree that they are a bargain and that's probably what keeps these locals emp...

Bangalore was fun. Met my friend from school days. Did lots of shopping at Lacoste. The real deal. I have pics. Went to a couple of pubs (pubs in Bangalore == bars in Vancouver, bars == something else). Ate LOTS of food. Saw few temples, palaces, walked bare-foot and burnt my feet. Went to church and heard the call to prayer from the mosque next door. That is the essence of India. Left for Goa.

I bought a new car. More appropriately, I bought my mum a new car. She's been driving her rattling car for almost 8 years. I got some money to spend. I have but one mum. So I got her a brand spanking new car. It isn't the fanciest thing out there, but I think we are all pleased with it. It is a new Hyundai Sonata. Now I know what some of you may think when you read this: Hyundai? Why would you spend money on a Hyundai? Aren't they tin cans of junk? Well, they are. Or more appropriately, they were. This Sonata is a new car for the 2006 year and is real nice on the inside and out. The finish in the car is quite nice, the interior is spacious and quiet. The inline 4 cylinder engine is nice and powerful. The ABS brakes are solid. The "shifter" is fun to play with (it isn't a real manual transmission what with no clutch and everything). It has a sunroof. And some other goodies.

My boss is a neat kind of guy. He drinks beer. He has a flair for showing off. He does a tasteful job of it. He impresses. He had a keg party at his 20th floor apartment. A lot of people came. Not just from work. Some of his family and friends too. Some of my co-workers came. A couple brought along their friends. Terrifically *hot* female friends. The kind that make you wonder. I have new found respect for my co-workers. Those women are hot. These guys don't make a move on them. One's in a long term relationship it looks like with his girlfriend. The other bats for the other team. I hope you get the drift. Though he did date her apparently. One was Australian. The other was exotic enough. Her name was familiar. A relative has the same name. I told her that. She told me where I am from. My jaw drops. How would she know? She's bright, she's sly, she's full of energy and a little too full of drink. She's a Psychology major. With a Masters. She said Freud never ha...

So, it has been a couple of weeks almost since my company got bought out (or merged if you are in polite company) by the bigger company. Their people have been all over this place. They have been giving us the sales pitch. They do things differently. They seem to want to keep us around. It is still the honeymoon period but I am starting to like them. The new director we probably will report to took us out to lunch twice and once to the bar. He seems to be a straight-shooter and probably got an earful from the less than happy staff. Of course, the new team has sounded great. But it remains to be seen whether they will live up to their own self-generated hype. They are giving us hope again. And I think the sceptics amongst us are being silenced. Not physically with duct-tape. Just by our own minds. Most likely because we want to hope and be convinced of a better future. The sad thing is, as human beings, we are seldom capable of enjoying the present with all its conveniences. We always w...

For those keeping track, I work for a software company. That company is being bought out by another. I understand that the takeover is almost complete now that the two companies have been given the green light to merge by the United States Department of Justice. So, a lot of us are wondering whether we will get to keep our jobs... There is good and bad from this merger. Allegedly, the new owners are much richer. They are also better at business. Why? Well, for one, they bought us out. For a long time, it was an Us vs Them competition. We felt like we owned a (albeit tiny) part of the company. And we thought we were winning (or leading at least). We lost. We felt let down. Now we get cashed out. There is little more to stick around for, except for the money and to see what the new overlords decide to do with our little enterprise. A lot of us are looking for greener pastures or just a change. The one thing about working where I am is that I have made many good acquaintances, maybe ev...

I went to watch the Russell Peters show in Vancouver tonight. He had 3 comics: the MC (forgot his name), Deb DiGiovanni, this Japanese-American dude named Yoshi and of course, Russell Peters himself. The Queen Elizabeth II theatre is huge and was packed. The whole show was full of laughs. Just amazing. From kheer to what thin girls can't do... this was just a fun-filled night. Russell Peters said he is going to be releasing a DVD and I can honestly say I cannot wait to get a copy of it. As he said, we want to make it onto the charts and I think that is a novel way to market it. Most of the material was new (Deb had some old stuff with the thin chicks etc) and really funny. I think he appeals to everyone because of how well he can make things that happen during the course of the show funny. Like when a fellow out back yelled I love you Russell when he was taking a sip of water. He took that and ran with it. Or when the guy who asked about his parents was made to eat humble pie (o...

This damn song has been stuck in my head. Some UBC Engineers (allegedly anyway) had created this blasphemous video (okay, so its just funny, not blasphemous). You can see Wreck beach, UBC, areas close to Vancouver airport etc. Their antics are homo erotic as per one of my co-workers (an ex UBC Engineering student himself), I guess he's right there and there is a nudey old fogey in it as well. It is hillariously funny though that these fellows spent the time to make such a well done video, makes me wonder what they do for projects in school. I know a couple of Engineering students (sadly, they don't seem to have the trademark Red jacket) who seem to have cool things to do for projects. One is actually building a sailboat out of carbon fibre and racing it somewhere apparently. Pretty neat stuff. The best I did in school was a OS kernel on a simulator. Not quite the same cool factor. But back to the point: the damn song. Its banned in my corner of the office on account of it get...

I have a perfect recipe for making you want to kick something, anything. First, make sure you have a frustrating as hell day at work. Then make sure that the people that run the public transit system go all the way to screw you over. In wonderfully rainy weather. By taking off just as you get to the bus. Then... you walk a kilometre and a half in the dark and wet night. Then have your god forsaken bank's online thingy not work. And have bills coming your way. Which you are *trying* to pay off via the online bank thing. I asked my managers at work for 2 things: 1) Laz-boy recliner with massager 2) Something softish to kick at when you need to kick at something So far, no go on the first one. Not even if I can somehow claim it alleviates my aching back. Oh well. Bollocks I say.

I am getting a new computer after 5 years. Oddly, I seem to be reversing trends in terms of pricing. My new computer will actually cost me more than my previous one. What am I going to do with the new one? Same sort as stuff as with the current one. I am going to install Linux on it and use it as my desktop. I will likely convert my current machine to a server to host files and who knows what else. So, what does it have? It has an Intel Dual Core processors clocked at 2.8Ghz, a really cool ASUS motherboard, an NCQ enabled Seagate hard drive, 2GB of DDR2 RAM running at 533Mhz, an LG 16x DVD burner, a 6600 LE MSI Video card (with DVI and TVO), one of those fancy floppy disks with multiple memory card readers and the kicker, a funky kick-ass case that looks like a critter from some game. It is called the NZXT Nemesis Elite and I have stolen a pic from a site and put it here: The eye of this case can be modified to change colours (wow!). I should get it next Saturday. My biggest surprise s...

I have been a distracted person. I have had other things on my mind. My mind wanders in directions I would rather it did not. If I were able to focus on what I doing instead of on the many other things that I could be doing, I might become a more productive person. I have been here before. I have fallen like this before too. She's new. I like her. I cross my fingers like I have many times before for the many different shes. I care a little less everytime it happens. I know how this will end. I dare to dream. I know the ending. I script it after all. I know the middle. Yet I dream. I get distracted. Eventually, I will fall. I will be crushed. I will survive. I will vow never to go down this path again. I will probably meet another she. I will go down this path. I will fall. I will suffer. I will not trade a day of this for almost anything. I dare to dream. Some day... the gods will be kind to me. Till then, I dream.